After Orlando, I Came Out As Bisexual To My Conservative Father

After Orlando, I Came Out As Bisexual To My Conservative Father

~ From Literally, Darling ~
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June is Pride Month , and all over the world people are celebrating what it means to be LGBTQIA and commemorating the impact that community of individuals has had on the history of the world. As this month comes to an end, I am celebrating my first major milestone as a member of this community: I finally came out to my parents as bisexual. Since I embarked on the journey of coming to terms with my sexuality, I would always consider coming out to my parents, but I continually avoided the subject. As a straight-presenting bisexual woman, I told myself I would only tell them about my identity if I had to, i.e. if I ever ended up in a committed relationship with another woman. I would ask myself silly questions that I wouldn’t even be considering if I was a straight person, like, “How do I know if I’m bi if I’ve never been in a relationship with a woman,” or “What if this is just a phase?” I felt like since I was discovering my sexuality so “late in the game” that maybe it was just a fabrication of my imagination. By giving in to this warped mindset, I was perpetuating the all-too-common practice of bi erasure , and I was delegitimizing my own identity. Society notoriously questions bisexual people because we don’t fit into one cookie cutter category. We’re too straight to be gay, too gay to be straight, and as a result people tend to push us back into the closet with their disbelief or indifference. As I result, I questioned my own sense of belonging in the LGBTQIA community, even though I endlessly assured my other bi friends that their membership card was 100-percent legitimate. The support and empowering words of my bi brothers and sisters helped ease my feelings of doubt and propel me through my journey, but it wasn’t until the horrific events in Orlando  that I really thought critically about my position as a member of the LGBTQIA community. While working through my feelings about the tragedy, I read a menagerie of different articles written by my LGBTQIA brothers and sisters. One piece that truly hit home discussed the complexities of being bisexual during this time of fear, uncertainty, and devastation. Her words were just what I needed to read, and they gave meaning to the conflict that I was feeling. I felt moved to write about my experiences and live my life in celebration of my identity, and I knew it was finally time to come out to my parents.

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